Take #45: Annabelle - Creation

It's not just dead horses that lend themselves to flogging - it can be done with ghosts as well, and this movie proves that.

Admittedly, "The Conjuring", which was a sterling example of the horror genre, is a difficult act to follow; but even so, Annabelle: Creation seems to be a pish-pash of several horror films rolled into one. Lots of banging on the left hand side of the piano keyboard does occasionally bring out the goose pimples, but it's more a response to stimulus than anything else.

Slickly made, but somewhat tenuous, this is a good watch only for diehard horror movie buffs. For the rest - if you wish to lose sleep, a lifesize doll is not the best method.

Take #44: Mom

This is a good film, with a splendid performance by Sridevi, beautifully matched by Nawazuddin Siddiqui. 


A great deal of finesse in the handling of the story and an apt background score were among the many highlights of this thriller; but I thought the end could definitely have been improved upon.


Everyone in the packed theatre clearly felt this was a great weekend watch. Go see it!

Take #43: Kaabil

It's always a good idea to go to a movie expecting nothing- that way, even something moderately good will come as a pleasant surprise. And so it was with this one.


I actually don't like Hrithik too much, but he's essayed the role of a blind vengeful young man far better then I could have expected. Then, I hadn't seen Yami Gautam on screen, and I quite liked what I saw. Ronit Roy's villainous turn was pretty good, too. The only let-down was the way the script was handled- a storyline like this could have been built up far more credibly. Especially after a brilliant ten opening minutes.

Watchable enough. But if you decide to see it, go back to my opening sentence.

Take #42: John Wick - Chapter Two

Definitely not a film for the squeamish, this sequel has bodies piling up by the truckload and more than one shade of Kill Bill in it.


Comfortable room, too, has been left for Chapter Three.


Blood and gore apart, this is a slick film - good music, tight direction, smooth editing and a most interesting cast of characters (including Laurence Fishburne) with crisp cameos. There was a beautiful sequence in a mirrored room, faintly reminiscent of Enter The Dragon, but with a large splash of Dali.


This film is recommended for Keanu fans and those who were waiting for the sequel; to the rest, if violence and dark art are not your thing, stay as far away as you can.

Take #41: Jab Harry Met Sejal

Considering that the choice of words of the title was hardly accidental, the least Imtiaz Ali could have done was to craft the dialogue with some care, so as to be able to come across as at least a pale imitation of the iconic film whose name this one shamelessly imitates. But alas, no: the movie has scarcely any redeeming features at all. Apart from being a full 25 minutes longer than necessary (I twice thought it was ending, but it wasn't), the plot is wafer-thin and eventually flounders and sinks, leaving a perpetually mini-skirted Anushka clinging on to Shah Rukh for dear life. 

Don't waste your money on this one.

Worklore #9: ATG ~ Lowering The Boom On The Employee

In the early 90’s, when I was part of a company that was once a household name but suddenly took the path to extinction, a curious trend came into the company’s daily routine: senior officers, occupying large rooms with nameplates on the doors, seen attending meetings at 11 a.m., were abruptly history at 6 p.m – their rooms were stripped bare, the nameplates removed, the officer never again to be seen in those premises. And no one ever knew what exactly had happened.

This, we gradually learned, was a phenomenon called Asked To Go, and was soon to become an intrinsic part of most Indian companies’ delivered HR functionality. Nearly thirty years later, I find that this practice has indeed been woven into the fabric of standard organisational people practices  - to such an extent that I am moved to wonder why companies do not hire Heads – Talent Disposal with the same elan as they recruit Heads – Talent Acquisition.

ATG is like the sword of Damocles – it knows no rules, and it can fall without warning. Moreover, it does not differentiate between meritorious employees and non-achievers: I remember a shocked banker telling me that his colleague in an adjacent room , rated  “A” for 3 years running, had been told to go because his “role was no longer relevant”; another banker who was promoted to VP in the past year was shipped out the next year because her role had been “merged”.  And there is nothing in the ATG process in most organisations that permits it to be practised with dignity or with consideration, or indeed, with the employee’s interest in mind – borne out most recently by a viral audio clip of an anguished employee who was given his notice pay cheque and told to leave the same evening.

Astonishingly, the capacity to perform ATG is actually being viewed these days as a special skill – I am informed that some HR heads actually trumpet this activity as a specialization or an achievement. I am at a loss to understand how stamping on an ant, as it were, can be viewed as a skill or, for that matter, an achievement, in any country, in any era, anywhere.

The hapless employee is gradually beginning to realise that there are no guarantees, and that (s)he has to look out for himself / herself. The casualty of this situation is loyalty and ownership – and with some employees, it is ethics. I have met several employees who have been affected by ATG displacements – the reactions span the entire spectrum from rage to depression, but the effect remains the same: the employee is scarred, and his or her entire perspective of employment and employers changes, occasionally with disastrous future results.

Seasoned HR professionals argue that ATG is a necessary pimple in an organisation’s  route to maturity, to lean management, to sustainable profitability. Perhaps they are right; but then, compassion doesn’t have to take a holiday in the process. There is a wrong way of doing everything, just as there is a right way – and HR departments need to understand that IR never stood for  “Inhuman Resource” in the first place. Companies are about people, and sometimes those people have to go, but that departure needs to be a send-off, and not an ejection.

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Worklore #8: Yesterday Is The New Tomorrow

Gone are the days when you were given 6 months to a year to settle down into a new job, and the days when your boss used to say to others that “(S)he’s still fairly new”, even ten months  into your tenure. A new workplace today is like the Skypak man’s domain – everything is wanted yesterday. Sounds daunting ? It isn’t, really. Here’s a quick survival guide:
1.      Remember that you’re technically an ‘old’ employee in just 30 days; so make every day count, don’t waste it.
2.      Get familiar with your organisation, environment, department, product portfolio  and work deliverables in two weeks or less.
3.      Don’t hide in your cubicle or your room – stay visible, and as vocal as is prudent. In other words, be seen, and within limits, be heard. Be pro-active rather than reactive.
4.      Once you feel like you’ve settled down (two weeks, remember ?), identify the departmental and the organisational priorities. Run these by your boss to make sure you’re not off-track.
5.      Target the low-hanging fruits, the problems that need resolution and have quick fixes with low investment in cost, time and stress.
6.      Don’t function in a vacuum. Interact within and outside the department, and ideally, across functions, to get a feel of what needs to happen and where you can contribute.
7.      You’ll encounter antagonism: soft-pedal, stay neutral and put it down on your to-do list.
8.      At the end of a month, define a 100-day target for yourself.

After Day 101, if you receive spontaneous feedback that suggests that it feels like you’ve already been there for a year, you know you’ve probably done something right.

Worklore #7: The Bus Stop Syndrome

Think about whether you've ever experienced this situation:

You're at a bus stop, waiting for your bus to arrive. It doesn't; but you keep waiting. Long minutes pass, until you actually start getting a little late for whatever it is that you wanted to get to. The crowd at the bus stop thins as other persons waiting with you get fed up and move out to seek other alternatives. You look at your watch and fume, but you're reluctant to go anywhere, since you’ve already been waiting so long. “Just a little longer,” you tell yourself. Soon, it’s too late. You can’t go anymore to that event or appointment or whatever; so, depressed, you get into a taxi and go home.

I call this the Bus Stop Syndrome. Don’t become a victim of it. Explore your options before your time runs out, or before it becomes too late. Just because something has been happening (or not happening) to you for a long time, doesn’t mean things have to stay that way. Explore that alternative: take your decision now, and move.

Worklore #6: Asset or Lie-ability ?

So why do people stuff false information into their c.v.’s and lie at interviews ? It all seems somewhat pointless, considering the kind of networking that’s possible these days, and also considering that background checks can be discreetly done at a relatively low cost. The system works a little slower than Pinocchio’s nose to expose creative c.v.-building, but it still does work.

Consider the case of the IIM Kolkata MBA who joined an MNC as a Regional Sales Head. Intelligent, affable, personable, he made an excellent first impression and settled down to his job really well. Until a young, alert HR Executive noticed that his IIM certificate seemed to look a different from the others in the personnel files. A couple of verification calls later, the RSH was out on his ear and the MNC was back to advertising the vacancy.

Then there was the case of the retired Air Force Officer who joined a prestigious club as its President, propped up a dandy little model Mig-21 on his desk and spent the time that he wasn’t discharging his duties narrating stories of his air force days to a fascinated audience. Until a new club member discovered that the revered President had, in fact, been of a very junior rank and the Mig-21 was probably a toy his son used to play with.

These are, of course, frauds. But there are the little white lies as well: “Have you made this cv yourself ?” “Yes, sir, I have” (and unsaid: “with a lot of help from naukri.com”). “Why do you want to leave this job ?” – “For better prospects” (and unsaid: “they shouldn’t have brought in someone over my head”). Unnecessary.

Bottomline: Don’t lie in your c.v. Don’t falsify facts. Don’t stretch the truth. Keep your creativity for the job, not the interview. It’s good to be optimistic and expect that you won’t get caught; but on the off-chance that you do, stop to consider the fact that nobody really likes a liar, and more importantly, nobody trusts one either. Even if you don’t actually get caught out in a falsehood, you could create a large enough gap between the matter in your c.v. and the persona that you’re presenting vis-à-vis, to leave behind a doubt as to your bonafides. If you haven’t given any BS in your profile, your interview is going to sound exactly like your bio-data reads: so your integrity and reputation are intact - even if you don’t actually get the job.

Worklore #5: The New Workplace

Employees have rarely had such an interesting time.

We've had first names and tie-less suits in use for some years now.

A year ago, an office of PwC introduced a norm that, except for client-facing employees, polished shoes and socks were no longer compulsory.

More recently, a couple of companies (as I recall, Accenture was one of them) canned the performance appraisal system.

Now, Tata Motors has announced that all designations will be done away with.

How does all this impact the ordinary employee, and what does it do for the Company's culture and working environment ?

Worklore #4: Parental Care ~ The Working Couple's Dilemma

More and more working couples at the tail-end of 25+ years of successful working lives are coming face to face with the quandary of how to contain and manage their priorities and their careers in a situation where their parents suddenly fall ill and need constant care and attention. The responsibility of a son or daughter is, after all, every bit as critical as that of a C-level manager in a corporate - possibly more so, because of the emotional and genetic connect. Is there a perfect solution, then ? Particularly in a country that hasn't even got around to addressing such things as paternity leave ? Different people are working different solutions out, but everyone is left somewhat dissatisfied : after all, there are only three immediate options - your home, their home or an old age home; and all three seem somehow imperfect. To add to the problem, geriatric care organisations are pathetically few. If you are over 45 and both of you work, and your parents are alone in another city and not in particularly good health, this is a question you need to address today; because tomorrow may be a little late for both sides. Do share your views on how you are coping, or on how you plan to cope.

Worklore #3: The Moment of Lies

There will come a time when all those magazine covers and accolades fade, and those CXO of the Year trophies are caked with dust because you forgot to hire someone to wipe them, because you live alone. There will come a time when you get tired of looking at the bank statements because there are so many of them, and you begin to wonder what you’re going to do with all the money because your daughter is married to an Australian tycoon and settled in Melbourne and your son is designing apps for Apple out of his shared studio apartment in downtown Frisco. There will come a time when you wish you had just one house – because, between tenants and interior decorators and tax commissioners and housing societies….you’re just, well, frazzled. There will come a time when you realise that you have a lifestyle, but that you never had a life. Don’t let your ambition and your organisation burn you out and leave you as a desiccated version of your original self: it just isn’t worth it. Save some of yourself for your friends, your family, and all the rest of the people who care about you but most importantly, save some of yourself for your own self, because you owe it to yourself. After all, that’s what the past few decades have been about.

Worklore #2: Empower Your Colleagues

Most people at your workplace who are from your stream or your function, will tend to view you right away as an aggressor, or as competition, or as an obstacle to their growth.  Smoke the peace pipe by straightaway giving them an early advantage over you, or a benefit; it won't hurt you, but it will induce them to tread a different path.  There are, of course, the exceptional few people who will try and swamp you based on what they perceive as a weakness - but those people are easily recognised and can be dealt with.

Worklore #1: The Irritating Recruiter Syndrome

You know you've fallen prey to the Irritating Recruiter Syndrome if you've ever experienced the following types of recruiters or placement consultants: TYPE A: The ones who want to know everything about you, right down to your birthmarks, but  who will tell you very little in return. TYPE B: The ones who have a long first conversation with you, take your cv and then make like Halley's Comet (they won't reappear again for the next 76.3 years). TYPE C: The ones who call you and describe a job to you that doesn't fit your profile; and when you say so, they say "Oh, I was hoping someone among your friends would fit this JD". TYPE D: The ones who arrange an interview with the client; you go to the trouble of attending it, only to be told by the client - "Sorry, the recruiter didn't get it right, you're not quite the kind of person we had in mind". TYPE E: The ones who send you a regret letter after reviewing your cv; the only trouble is that the letter starts off as "Dear Arjun" - but your name is Sanjay. Have you met any other types ? Do share !